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Threesome Sex Tips for Men Who Want To Get Started
The Special Joys of Threesome Sex Tips for Men Who Want To
Get Started
By Joan...
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| PAGE 1 | THREESOME SEX
TIPS FOR WOMEN |
The following information has been prepared for men who wish to consider adding
male - female - male (MFM) sexual pleasures to their sensual life. It is the
basic premise of this piece that the reader has already decided to open himself
to the pursuit of threesome adventures. I sincerely hope these thoughts will
benefit you as you plan ways of bringing about one or more MFM threesome
experiences for your pleasure... and for the pleasure of the woman in your life.
By the way, it is not my desire to "win converts" to my chosen lifestyle.
Rather, it is my hope that readers will open their minds and relationships to
the special pleasures and possibilities that threesomes provide.
First: I suggest that you let your primary female partner know that you are open
to or wish to pursue the addition of one or more people to your shared
"recreational sex" experiences. Start having conversations about the distinction
between sex for love - sex for recreation and sex for procreation. Let her see
X-rated videos or read books or magazines which spotlight the pleasures of
multiple-partner recreational sex.
I know that initially that could send shock waves through some wives or girl
friends. But, be open and honest with your feelings. Let her know the kind of
fantasies that stimulate you (her and another gal focusing on your pleasure,
another guy and you focusing on her pleasure, you giving simultaneous pleasure
to her and another gal, you alone with another gal, her alone with another guy,
you and her with more than one other person, etc.).
Chances are she will not quickly jump at the idea of inviting others into your
sex life. Most women equate great sexual fulfillment and the warmth of sexual
sharing with emotions akin to love. That is why MOST women never allow
themselves to enjoy more than one man at a time and miss out on the wonderful
expansive possibilities of enhanced, multiplied pleasures. Most women who do
allow themselves to try a few threesomes find that their sex lives are greatly
improved and that their personal levels of sexual fulfillment is GREATLY
elevated!
I went through those typical female emotions in the early years of my sexual
development and particularly in the earliest experiences of enjoying more than
one male partner during the same time period (even when it was not involving
group sex). You men seem less likely to experience those sex=love feelings.
Percentage wise, more men than women tend to be able to enjoy sex for itself and
keep the pleasure of those experiences separate from their emotional
relationships.
No Commitment Sex partner
Needed
This article assumes that you have a wife or
woman in your life. Naturally, you could choose to go outside your primary
relationship to experience MFM, FMF, or group pleasures. Frankly, many of the
men who I have enjoyed along with my two guys have been married guys who were
enjoying threesome sex even though the primary woman in their life was not
willing to get involved in threesomes. However, until later in this piece, I am
focusing on efforts you can make to keep your sexual pleasures something you
SHARE with your spouse or girl friend.
You and your main lady may have never even discussed opening your sex life to
the inclusion of others. Probably, it will be you who initiates the idea. In
that case, you need to open her mind to such ideas GENTLY! Share in watching
X-rated movies which include scenes which reflect what is on your mind. Share in
reading Forum or other magazines which feature stories which reflect what is on
your mind. When you see such films or read such stories, let her know that they
turn you on and watch her reactions.
Ask her what she thinks of such "recreational sex" experiences. Ask her if she
would like to experience the feeling of another guy's cock inside her while you
cuddle, kiss and caress her. While you are in the heat of passion, ask her how
she would like to feel another guy tonguing and kissing her clit and pussy while
you hold and kiss her. When she is nearing her orgasm, ask her how she would
like to have both of her breasts sucked simultaneously one by you, and one by
another guy.
Be patient. Let these thoughts soak in over as along a period of time as is
needed. The rest of this article assumes you have successfully persuaded her to
"try" a threesome or some couple-swap situation, etc. This is when you need to
show her your highest level of love and affection. Try to extract a promise that
"try" means at least a few such experiences, just in case the first one or two
are less than satisfactory.
Once you have gained her agreement to try such extra-partner-sex situations you
need to watch her responses in the days ahead. Is she really enthusiastic about
the new possibilities ahead or is she now reflecting some second thoughts or
potential jealousy or fear of jealousy by you.
You may want to talk further about how you will both deal with any potential
jealousy that may surface further down the line. You may also wish to make it
clear how each of you will communicate with the other about limitations either
of you want to impose on your expanded sex life as things develop.
Second: You will want to ALWAYS KEEP IN MIND that the anticipated new
experiences you are about to have should be SHARED experiences. Shared between
you and your wife, or you and the primary woman in your life.
Early on, you will want to determine which of you will identify the potential
additional person or people you will invite into your sex life. Will SHE bring
the extra person or people into your shared bed, or will YOU be the one to
identify that person and create the setting to bring that person into your
shared sex life.
Maybe you will want to SHARE in creating a "prospect list" or in determining a
method of identifying a prospective extra person (or persons), or
characteristics desired in that extra person (tall, short, younger, older,
married, single, certain physical characteristics, local, non-local, friend,
stranger, etc.). She may ask you who you think you would enjoy inviting to join
in your expanded sex life. You may even want to start with some couple-couple
action first, so you can both gain a higher level of comfort in the earliest
experiences. Also you can make some initial contacts with others who have opened
their sex lives.
From my experience as a woman, a large part of the fun of MFM and FMF threesomes
is the anticipation, the planning, the fantasizing about it in advance with your
primary partner. I know women who have not actually experienced their first
threesome until LONG after having decided that they would do it, enjoying with
their mates the prolonged anticipation and knowledge that "one day" it would
actually happen. However, remember that you can fantasize too much. Either or
both of you can build expectations too high.
Sometimes it is necessary to postpone that actual first experience due to need
for privacy, discretion and anonymity. It may require that you place ads or
follow-up ads or that you travel to another city. It may require the acquisition
of a discrete PO box or private voice mail subscription. It may require the both
of you or you or her alone doing some initial "interviews," to enhance your
shared "comfort level" with a prospective new guy or gal.
Even if you choose someone who is a close friend
of one or both of you, it may take some time setting up the right situation (a
shared date, a special dinner, an over-night stay together someplace, etc.)
where things can warm up properly.
Third: Think about whether you seek ONE-TIME, TEMPORARY or LONG-TERM additional
partners? I know that the permanent three-way partnership that my two guys and I
live in is rather unique. Few others will even want to establish a long-term
three-way relationship. Two-way "primary" partnerships with an occasional third
person joining in just for the fun of it, that is the more typical threesome
scene.
However, I know a number of couples who have opened themselves to an extra guy
or gal in their sex life ONLY on the premise that the extra person is also a
friend or relative of one or both of them. I know women who have invited their
sisters or college roommates into on-going threesome pleasures with their
husbands or boyfriends and women who have welcomed on-going threesome
relationships when the extra guy was a friend or brother of their husband or
primary male friend. Some couples have restricted their threesome ventures to
one, two or three such friends or relatives and would not consider inviting a
"stranger" into their bed.
When a close friend or relative is chosen and it works out, such relationships
can often continue for years. As a matter of fact, they usually continue
indefinitely, unless one of the parties proves to be a jerk, or unless
circumstances change for one or more of the parties.
Other times, women absolutely refuse to consider inviting into their beds anyone
who either she or her guy know or are related to. Everyone is different.
Everyone has different circumstances
When a stranger is chosen, it can be a "one-night affair," or it could turn into
an oft repeated pleasure for all. Sometimes couples start by intending things to
be temporary or one-time events only to find that they have developed a new kind
of friendship that they all wish to periodically repeat over a long-term period.
GETTING STARTED:
Once a couple has decided to open themselves to
the addition of one or more occasional "playmates," there are a couple of basic
things that must happen.
1. I have mentioned it above, but you MUST deal with "the jealousy factor"
before it comes up. If either party believes they would be jealous if they saw
the other having sex with someone else, get it out in the open immediately. In
this event, you will both want to establish a pact that (a) you will be totally
open with each other along the way, (b) you will only have sex with another
partner while the potentially-jealous partner is present (or only after the
potentially-jealous partner knows and agrees), and (c) UNTIL YOU MUTUALLY DECIDE
OTHERWISE, the extra guy will be for the purpose of joining you in focusing
doubled-attention on the wife or, the extra gal will ONLY be for the purpose of
joining the wife in focusing doubled-attention on the husband. The person who's
receiving the doubled-attention will focus their attention PRIMARILY on their
spouse. Example, while the extra guy is nibbling on her pussy or filling it with
his cock, her husband is cuddling with her and necking with her while she talks
with him, telling him what it feels like to be in his arms while another guy is
stroking in and out of her, etc.
2. Remember to jointly decide on any
LIMITATIONS you mutually agree to impose on your proposed threesome. For
example, she insists that the other guy wear a condom or NOT enter her anally.
Or, he insists that the other guy NOT come in her pussy or mouth. Or, you
mutually decide that extra partners NOT be given your real names and NOT be
invited to your home. Maybe you won't have any such limitations, but if either
partner has strong feelings on any of these subjects, set the RULES up front so
you can share them (as it may be appropriate) with the third person.
3. Decide on THE WAY TO MEET a third person to join you in a threesome. By now
you have probably agreed that you want to focus on inviting a friend or
acquaintance to join you or you may have decided that you DO NOT WANT to involve
someone you already know.
In that case, you may want to (a) attend a Swing Party for the purpose of
meeting prospective threesome friends, or (b) patronize an Adult Store or Adult
Movie House for the purpose of making potential contacts (this works often
couples are able to make eye contact with a guy [less often with a gal] or a
couple in an Adult Bookstore or XXX Movie Theater, motion them to the door of
the Bookstore or to their seat within the theater and openly let their wishes be
known without fear of rejection and often with successful results), or (c)
patronize a Topless Bar (this also works and can be a way to meet that extra
gal), or (D) follow-up ads or place ads in local or national contact
publications and/or Internet.
This last one is a very good way to meet people, but you probably will need to
have a email address, PO box and/or an anonymous voice mail service
(attached to a pager is even better). This will allow one or both of you to meet
the prospective third person and get to know them while remaining anonymous.
Lets say hubby is meeting a prospective guy. The meeting could be at a bar or
lounge. Wife could go in first, and sit at another table so she can watch while
hubby "interviews" the prospective guy. They can have a pre-arranged signal
(like wife dropping her hankie on the floor) as a signal that "he looks good,"
or "No Way." Then the wife can join them or not as she wishes. Or, he can excuse
himself to the rest room so he can meet her in the back alone before she joins
them or before he says, "We'll call you."
BE AWARE: If the guy or gal has never been involved in a threesome before, you
probably DON'T want to select him/her as one of your first extras.
4. Have a plan as to WHERE you would prefer meeting this third person for your
first encounter. At your place? Generally not a good idea. Motels are good.
Motels that offer hot tubs are even better (as a way to cut the ice). Adult
motels are often the best. If the third person is a gal, you can probably be a
bit more flexible in where you first meet.
5. Now that you have the basic decisions out of the way, now is the time to plan
your wearing apparel to fit the occasion. If you will be meeting at a beach,
pool or hot tub you should both consider some minimal, sexy swim wear. If you
will be meeting at a bar, she should dress as sexy as possible (short skirt,
semi-revealing blouse with no bra, etc.) and if you are meeting a gal, you
should dress sharp to look handsome. If you will be going to an X-rated movie in
the hopes of meeting a guy, she should wear a loose, easy-opening blouse with no
bra, and a very full skirt with no panties so that within the dark of the
theatre she can choose to retain a discrete appearance, or allow you to have
access to her breasts and crotch as the situation unfolds.
6. Make plans to DO IT SOON! Remember, you can fantasize too much. Either or
both of you can build expectations too high. Remember also that the sex you have
between the two of you IS LIKELY to be better than sex with THE FIRST FEW extra
people, just because you know each other better, and there is less chance of
anxiety getting in the way. You may get a guy who "gets off" and wants to leave
without really GIVING pleasure to your wife. That can be the pits! Or, you may
get a gal who "freezes up" just as the fun begins. It may take a few threesome
experiences before you locate extra partners who truly melt into your shared
love-making wishes.
7. Assuming the threesome went EVEN MODERATELY WELL you should both genuinely
thank the third person, and embrace them before they leave. You may want to try
it again with this person. They should leave with a feeling of "warm fuzzies."
8. Finally, after each threesome experience, the two of you MUST spend some time
re-living the experience with each other - what it felt like - how you would
each like it to be different or similar next time. How you each appreciate and
love the other for helping to make the threesome possible. Be sure to give your
wife or girl friend extra tender loving after your threesome experiences. You
might even want to EACH write down your thoughts on each of those early
threesome experiences and share them with someone (like me), just so you can
express yourself fully and so you can remember later how those initial
experiences went.
SOME IDEAS FOR GETTING THE ACTION
GOING:
When you have identified a prospective third party
and the situation allows, let the opposite sex dance with that third party,
invite them to join you for a dip in a hot tub someplace, invite them to join
you in providing a full body massage to one of the three of you.
If your chosen "prospect" is a friend or relative, consider creating a setting
at your home, motel, beach resort or a ski lodge where you all have minimal
clothes or where you can all recline on a blanket in front of a roaring fire.
Then one of you can start massaging the other while inviting the third person to
assist.
There are lots of ways to "break the ice." Removal of clothes or intimate kisses
or blind-folded caresses or performing certain requested sexual acts. Requests
for "Truth" can open the way for asking intimate questions about sexual
preferences, past sexual experiences, and determining the other person's wishes
for exploring sex together NOW.
When the extra person is a guy, you can always note how your wife or girl friend
really loves to receive a massage particularly a four-handed, full-body massage.
Seldom will the extra guy turn down that offer. Naturally, if oil is involved,
everyone will have to shed their clothes so they don't get oil on their clothes.
NEED MORE IDEAS?
Or are you a single guy? Check out the
next page or visit the
Swingers GUIDE. You will find there a
lot of dating and lifestyle related information.
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You see that banner at next. That would be
Elisha! Her porn star name is Jana Cova but but her real name is Elisha Keys.
She have been employed by this excellent site since 1998 to answer any sex
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the model area. She have lived in America all her life and being single and
sexually active. She certainly know what she is talking about when it comes to
sex.
I hope she will provide very liberal but useful
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THREESOME SEX TIPS FOR WOMEN |
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